Sunday, January 30, 2011

Bad Day

This was one hell of a day. I got to work, had to finish a half dozen jobs that no one else finished. I also had to water all the house plants, four large tables worth, because it wouldn't be done unless I did it and I'm off for the next two days. I was late going to lunch and got chewed for it.

That was the last straw for me, I could handle how angry I was. I'm a good hard worker and I have to tell customers that "Oh I'm sorry I can't help you anymore, I have to go to lunch." I'm not like that! I got so angry, so near to loosing my control that I felt the only way for me to gain that balance and find a release was to injure. I burned twice, not bad but I still did it. There are two red welts where the matches touched me. I've been drinking, adding Kaluah to my coffee. I haven't eaten yet, not sure that I want to and I've cut.

I feel like I'm on autopilot flying towards self destruct. This day sucked.

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